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Winter-Een-Mas Game List 2/4 – FPS

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Even though I am an all-around gamer, if I had to choose I’d call my self an FPSer (First-Person Shooter). I love that brainless killing of AIs, that witty way around every hinder, the pressure of having to be faster than your shadow and smarter than your enemies, and that wonderful empowering feeling of being a mean lean killing machine with thousands and thousands of kills on my conscience. I’m actually a pacificist, and refused to join the Norwegian military and ended up working for the state instead, so it is kind of weird that I love all of these violent killing games, but I truly and almost intimately do!

And yeah, I do like singleplayer games the best I have to admit, I like the campaigns. I’ve played multiplayer games, but I get something of a bitter taste in my mouth when I hear all these stupid dorks complaining about everything and nothing. I am in no mood to for n00b-bitching when I’m out killing people. Stay 1337, stay clean, kill ’em fast and painless and aim for a headshot. I want to direct your attention towards (some of) the Commandments of Gaming once more:

  • V. Thou shalt not kill steal.
  • VI. Thou shalt not frag… without gloating in the aftermath. [I don’t know about this… I would insert “of unquestionable ownage” in the end]
  • VII. Thou shalt lose graciously; thou shalt not bitch or whine when fragged.
  • IX. Thou shalt teabag only in the wake of unquestionable ownage.
  • XI. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s rocket launcher; […] nor his video card, nor his high score.

After playing for a while this bitter taste of n00b-bitching takes over the whole joy of the game, and in the end I just get sick and leave the game for ever. N00bs: I h473 u, ph34r my wr47h (4nd ki11ing 5pr33s)! Translation: I hate you, fear my wreath (and killing sprees)
On to todays games:

Half-Life (1 and 2 and 2Ep1 and 2Ep2)
Wow. Wow! Haven’t played it? Then consider yourself banned (by me) from games until you do. I love Valve for making this game, Valve is great. It has brought so much to the world of gaming! Most people think the story isn’t “all that”, but I still think it is one of the better FPS-stories ever made, and the HL-world is amazing. It’s so nice listening to crazy-scientist-propaganda while killing soldiers of evil in HL2. But what makes it a really, really great FPS-game series is the basic FPS functions of the game. It’s made simple and good, so the playability is wonderful.

I’ve gone through HL1 about a dozen times on hard, one time using just the pistol (except when I met bosses and didn’t have any ammo left) and HL2 two or three times now (and I am considering doing the gnome quest). It still amazes me every time I play it, even when I know where the enemy is located. Actually, there is this headcrab in HL1 which I’ve had nightmares about. It’s not just any headcrab, it’s one special one, located in a shaft, which ALWAYS frightens me to death (and usually just jumps to his slow death by falling) even if I know it’s there. The silent protagonist, Gordon Freeman, is the best game-hero ever.

Oh, and you have CS, Opposing Force, Blueshift, Natural Selection, Garry’s Mod and Day of Defeat… How could this not be the bestest FPS ever? “With my brains and your brawns, we’ll make an excellent team.”

Dead Space
This was amazing! I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a clean and beautiful game in my entire life. They’ve done something new with FPS’s and it really worked. Of course, you are wandering around a space ship as (another) silent protagonist while massacring aliens (which look like they are from an 80’s horror movie) with different tools of the trade (no, not guns, but industrial flamethrowers, cutters and other engineering tools). Being able to jump around when there is no gravity (or air for that sake) really made this exiting. They did something new to the scary-FPS genre, where they didn’t try to scare you by tossing enemies at you in a scary and fast way with loud music, but by just stressing you out and presenting you to unknown and uncertain situations. Very cool.

Left 4 Dead
A zombie-4 player-FPS? Need I say more? This was fun! At first glance it lacks a real campaign, but if you look around you, and take some time to read the
scribbling on the wall on the walls you can find an exciting story being passively told. It is also a great twist by having the characters say different things every time you play, personally I think the joke i liked the best is when Bill jokes about the current zombie invasion being nothing compared to the last one. The speed of the game is intoxicatingly fast, so you have to totally immerse yourself in the game, otherwise you won’t last a second, and hope for the love of god that your fellow players do to, because without good co-op in this game it’s almost impossible to finish (at a higher level of difficulty at least).

Being able to play both the zombies and the survivors makes this so intense I almost ended up with a bloody lip (I suck my own lip when I play FPS’s… yeah, it’s embarrassing…) in total, agonizing, adrenaline-rushing gaming pleasure. This was the best game I played that came out in 2008. May the Gods of gaming always be with you Valve.

[Update:] Check out this Java game called Left 4k Dead. It’s fun. For 5-10 minutes. Yay.

I’m also inclined to mention Call of Duty 4 (I know its almost cheating!), which had the most brilliant use of storytelling techniques I’ve ever seen in a game. The story was so-and-so, but the way they told it was magical.  [SPOILER ALERT:] Having a whole level just to climb out of a burning helicopter, making your way up that icy cold floor, out into the air, hearing your heart throbbing like crazy just to find out that when you get out of it you just die… amazing.

Other (really) important FPS-games in my life:

  • GTA 4 (Free roam third person shooter)
  • Call of Duty 4
  • FarCry
  • Max Payne

Yesterday I had to be social, so I didn’t get much gaming done. I did however have time to kill earth a couple of times in Pandemic 2. Man, Madagascar was difficult to kill!

(more on FPS’s in 2 days)


Written by Aslak

January 28, 2009 at 17:00

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